Most days weren't easy. Sometimes she would just cover herself with the sheets hoping no one would find her and sometimes she would hide in dark places. She often told her friends about her problems and issues and they told her that she was the black sheep of the family. She believed everything her friends said and since then she wondered to herself if she was the reason. She lost sight of what's ahead focusing on all the hidden struggles, fears, storms and the noises. She became distracted by her circumstances and her surrounding. She was absolutely clueless. She didn't know what to do or what to say. She grew up being this quiet little girl who has all the faults on herself. Many times she tried to push the stones and mountains in front her but she couldn't because she didn't have hope. At such a young age, she went through heartbreak. She always wondered why couldn't her family be as happy as the other families. She was emotionally abused and torn apart. She grieved through her childhood and she waited for the moment that will completely restore her broken soul.
She waited for years. It never came. At that time, she was only living for the sake of her sister. She thought that if she left, it would be selfish of her to leave her sister all by herself going through the same storm that she went through. She loved her sister very much. When she turned into a teenager, she couldn't handle the heartbreak anymore. She wanted to die. She wanted to leave all the suffering behind and commit suicide. That night before she planned to do it, she went and sat by her sister. She told her that she wanted to die and that tore her sister apart. When her sister cried her eyes out, she knew that she couldn't do it. She chose to remain strong despite the heavy baggage that she's been carrying all these years. She had to learn how to get rid of that clutter that has been crowding her space and shift her mind to a more quiet space where she can focus on being a person who is free. She needed to push away her fears of uncertainty and to be certain herself. She had to learn how to drown out the noises and distractions that didn't matter. Pulling herself out from the grave wasn't really a piece of cake. She struggled. A lot. Her childhood memories, scarred with distasteful pain and sorrows showed her that she wasn't worth a lot. She needed to know the truth. So she went looking for answers. She searched and searched.
Today, her struggles are still there. It never left her but she left them. Her struggles didn't matter to her anymore because she knows that all her problems are just temporary and never permanent. She understood that everything that has happened is either a blessing or a lesson. It is a sure thing to say that she is now a happy grown teenage girl who has eliminate every pain and struggle that bore no fruits and that didn't bring her joy by just having a glimpse of hope. She didn't just survive but she won and still winning the battle of life.